You CAN Be Happy for People Who Get What You Want

Jealousy is an ugly thing. We’ve been taught all our lives that it’s bad. So why do we still feel it?

Jealousy stems from the belief that there’s not enough to go around – enough success, love, luck, or (fill-in-the-blank) with whatever it is you want. But there IS enough. Just because someone else gets what you want doesn’t mean there’s nothing left for you.

Don’t get me wrong. I know all about those ugly green swirls in the pit of your stomach when you hear someone else got what you’ve been pursuing for years – someone who didn’t work as hard as you or as long as you and got what you wanted before you. How fair is that?

That’s called life.

But that doesn’t mean it’s over for you, and it takes nothing away from you.

You are unique a individual on your own journey with your own unique talents and gifts. There has never been another you, and there will never be. Feel special yet? Because you’re a one-of-a-kind, your journey isn’t going to look like anyone else’s. Your gains don’t take away from anyone else, and others’ gains don’t take away from you because their journey has nothing to do with yours.

We’re all put on this earth to share our gifts and everything we need is out there just waiting for us to find it. The adventure is going out there to discover it – like our own personal geo cache filled with all that we need to make our dreams come true. When we embrace this, life becomes rich and exciting.

It also leaves us with no reason not to be genuinely happy for other people’s success. When we support others, we put our best selves forward and spread positive energy which enables us to better and faster reach our own goals. Win-win!

Case study – We’ve all seen the football players who stomp around having tantrums because they don’t feel they’re getting enough playing time. What do we think? That they’re babies. What does it get them? Released from an NFL contract. Really? Was it worth it to lose all that to their jealousy?

Then there are the Peyton Mannings, who show humble integrity when things are going well, and humble integrity when things are going horribly. What do we think? We want to be like them. What does it get them? Lifelong adoring fans, lots of playing time, and ongoing NFL contracts because people like to be around them.

Positive, supportive people draw positive energy, people and outcomes into their lives.

Let’s all be Peytons.

Have a good one. 🙂

The Benefits of Simple Kindness

My favorite TV commercial of all time is the Fidelity Investments ‘kindness’ commercial. You know the one. Someone watches as another person does a simple kindness for a stranger. Then another person watches as the previous watcher does a kindness for another stranger, and so on. We can’t help but feel inspired, which speaks beautifully to our humanity.

What we forget is that giving a kindness often lifts us up even more than the person receiving the kindness. A special glow shines within us for the rest of the day, and who knows how many people we touch with that glow.

Case Study – When my daughters and I finally made it to the front of a very long Starbucks line, we met the harried employee with smiles and pleases and thank you’s. We had a fairly large order and I apologized due to the long line behind us. The employee gave me a bright smile and said she’d rather take a big order from a friendly customer any time, and that we’d made her day.

Now that felt like cheating. Making her day had only taken a couple seconds. Just a choice to be kind and courteous, and my daughters and I were uplifted for the rest of our day. Nice how that works.

I imagine every kindness as pixie dust tossed into the air to chase the away the dark clouds of negativity and loneliness. Let’s spread as much of it as we can today.

Be sure to let me know if you make someone’s day, or if someone else makes your day.

Have a good one!